With all of the virtual communities popping up all over the place, I’ve been thinking a lot about different modes of services I could offer young adults. The world is so wired in now, why shouldn’t my clients expect me to be, too? A lot of people wonder why they have to give up an hour (plus driving time) to come see me in my office.
I think video chat could work, although I hate Skype, mostly because it’s so hard to make eye contact on it. You’re not making eye contact, you’re staring at your camera. I don’t do video therapy yet, but I may go with it because I think it makes therapy more accessible, and I’m all for that.
I do phone sessions when it’s necessary, but it’s not an ideal way to do therapy. Here’s why:
You say, “No, really, I get along great with my mother.”
In person, I can see you shift in your seat, avoid eye contact, reach for a drink of water, and get uncomfortable. That tells me that maybe it’s complicated, and maybe I should probe a bit more in order to get the scoop. Or, you smile genuinely, and I can see that she’s an important support person in your life. That’s important information for me.
As you can imagine, It’s a whole lot easier to assess those things in person, or even over a computer, than on the phone. On the phone, I’m trying to pick up hints in your tone of voice, without any of the visual clues that help me assess what’s going on.
Also, silences.
In person, I usually know why there’s silence. You’re digesting something you or I just said; you’re feeling strong emotions and having trouble speaking; you’re checking out and need to be pulled back.
On the phone. silence could mean you’re feeding your dog and having trouble managing the food and the phone at the same time – I have no way of knowing. On the phone, I’m a lot more likely to say something into the silence than I am in person, because I just can’t tell what’s going on.
I do phone sessions when they’re necessary because a client can’t make it into the office, but they’re not ideal.
And that’s why I need to actually see you. For now, it’s in my office. Eventually, who knows, maybe they’ll figure out a way people can make eye contact over Skype.